i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
she pinky promised me she was 18
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Randomize