We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Randomize
