Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Randomize
