I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
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