Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Randomize
