Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
