With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I had to cum in my sink.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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