i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
