ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
