if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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