He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
