booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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