do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
