Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
