I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize