You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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