We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
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