found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
we should paint friendship bongs
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