Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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