omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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