whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
