What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Randomize