I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
