I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
i came on her dog
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
