Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
