there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
