i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
cat food counts as protein by the way
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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