she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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