i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
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