but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Randomize
