Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
