I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
