He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
We are two peas in an std pod
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Someone came in the potted fern
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
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