when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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