He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Randomize
