dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
