We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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