Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
My brain says no but my pants say off.
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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