I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize