I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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