will power is for people who don't want to get laid
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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