What a fucking waste of an outfit
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Randomize
