ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
