Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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