smell my finger.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
