I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Randomize
