you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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