she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
What a dumb baby whore.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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