I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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