I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
He felt like a one man threesome
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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