I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
